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They aren’t stupid enough to come to Haleyville, are they?

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Patriot Guard Riders escorting Mark's body to funeral
Patriot Guard Riders escorting Mark’s body to funeral

Have you ever seen protesters at a military or first responder’s funeral?  For normal, God-fearing, patriots, this is unimaginable.  But it happens all over the country, all the time.  There are groups of people who think the way to combat the calamities in the world is to protest the funerals of those who protect us—everyone, even loons who won’t recognize it.


The video above is taken from an interview I conducted in 2011 with the two members of the north Alabama Patriot Guard Riders who were in charge of Mark’s funeral.  Dave and his wife Cheryl are selfless Americans who voluntarily attend funerals all over the state for fallen military and first responders.  This is a big job.  Not only do they show up to various events, such as viewings, Angel Flights, funerals, memorials, etc, they also have to organize with others to attend.  They normally meet with local law enforcement too.

In chapter 5 of My Brother in Arms, I share that when planning Mark’s funeral, we knew the possibility that protesters would show up.  Initially we thought, “they wouldn’t be stupid enough to show up to a small town in the south”.  The reality is they are stupid enough.  They apply for permits and are normally granted them.

Planning the funeral for a loved one is hard enough logistically and emotionally.  Throw in potential for loud, crude, insensitive and spineless protesters, it can really complicate the planning and wear on the emotions an extreme amount.  The day before the funeral I asked, “how can they do something like this?”  The chief of Mark’s squadron said “We fight for their rights too.”

I don’t know everything that went on behind the scenes, but I know the city was prepared for any adversity.  The mayor said that legally he had to give them a permit, but he decided where they were allowed to protest.  I think their spot was behind the football stadium with nothing but woods between them and the school where the funeral was to take place.

My role in this was simple: I called the PGR and asked them to come.  One way they show respect is by only showing up if the family requests them.  Once I gave the word, they started mobilizing.  They attended Mark’s Angel Flight, viewing, and funeral.  There were over 200 bikes in Haleyville to support Mark and our family.

Some of our family members–uncle and cousins–were filled with anger at the thought of protesters.  When a particular group posted they would be in Haleyville for Mark’s funeral, word got around the community fast, even in neighboring towns.  I vividly remember my uncle Will with tears in his eyes because his anger was kindled sufficiently.  He said he wouldn’t allow it to happen.  He and other family members were prepared to get physical.  I can’t blame them for feeling that way.  We appreciated the support, but never expected anyone to do anything like that (although it would be warranted if it did happen).  We just expect humans to honor and respect our fallen heroes, not make a mockery.

I encourage you to look up videos of the PGR to see them in action.  Watch them silent protesters, not by violence, but by the roar of their bikes.  Watch them protect the families from even seeing them by acting as barriers between the hostile group and the family, while holding beautiful American flags.

And for the record, no unwelcomed zealots showed up.  After all, maybe they used some common sense and realized making an appearance in Haleyville, AL isn’t a smart idea.

We are forever grateful to the PGR and many volunteers who joined them temporarily, for being present for three days plus.  One family friend, Steve, was gathered with the PGR before the funeral and when I saw him I said “Steve, I didn’t know you were part of the Patriot Guard”.  He said, “I just joined.”  He was one of the many bikers leading Mark’s body from the funeral home to the school for the funeral.

“Standing for those who stood for us”.  This is the PGR’s motto.

Here is a short video of the PGR in action just before Mark’s funeral:

Honor a Seasoned Vet vs. Sequestration

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Due to the nature of Mark’s book, there were many sensitive details from his military life that needed to be checked.  I voluntarily asked AFSOC (Air Force Special Operations Command) to review my manuscript to ensure I didn’t publish anything inaccurate, incriminating, or that would cause harm/danger to Americans and our military.  There were many areas to consider: call signs, team names, specific # of deaths, etc.  They were great to work with—very responsive and closed out the case within a few weeks.

They gave me a list of about 13 spots in the book to change or remove.  They actually never said “do not print”.  They called them “areas of concern/suggested changes”.

I’ve never talked about the details of their list, but want to address one here.  It’s important because if I’d taken it out–as they suggested–it would have prevented readers from seeing another example of Mark’s personality while down range.

In Ch. 11, page 143 of “My Brother in Arms”, Mark is with his teammate Ish, who is on his final mission of that deployment.  Mark was there to take Ish’s spot as it was time for him to head back state side.  He was a seasoned, 13 year veteran and more than adequately taught Mark what he needed to know in those short few weeks they were together.  FYI, Ish is the recipient of two Silver Stars from the War on Terror—he ain’t scared and was able to inflict maximum damage to our enemies.

When all their work was done and it was time to head back to base, Mark requested over the radio for their air support to do one last flyby in honor of Ish’s last mission (Mark loved requesting flyovers from Apache’s, A-10’s, and F-18’s, as you can see in the video from his helmet cam above).  The pilots obliged and “buzzed our line”.  After that Mark got back on the comms to say thanks and then declared (full of irony), “I’ve been consoling Ish for the last 24 hours because he’s no longer the primary JTAC at Cobra.”  I can easily hear Mark saying that.   

To most people, there is no reason this would be sensitive.  However, AFSOC viewed it as such due to sequestration and budget cuts (remember this was 2010 when it happened and 2013 when published).  Basically, it could appear wasteful with the air assets and fuel.

I appreciate Ish sharing this story with me.  He had a lot of experience from his multiple deployments and he willingly shared that knowledge with Mark.  There is only so much he could teach him in a war zone.  I’m sure Mark had to learn many things on his own, as with most situations in life.

You can read more about Mark’s time with Ish, as well as his remaining five months while deployed.  Just look to the right and preview or purchase the book.

I really appreciate AFSOC’s review and support.  After all, they didn’t have to review it for me, especially as quickly as they did.

Do you agree I made the right call by leaving this story in the book?

Mark and Ish at Firebase Cobra
Mark and Ish at Firebase Cobra

Training to walk 35 Continuous Miles

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Walk participant in 2012.
Walk participant in 2012.

After Mark’s death, I organized an annual memorial birthday walk. This event would serve two purposes:

  1. To raise money for Mark’s foundation
  2. Put myself thru some pain to honor Mark and his sacrifice

So, it’s that time of year again that I’m training to walk a continuous 35 miles. Many people have said to me over the years, “I think I’m gonna walk with you.” I really appreciate it, but most people don’t realize the toll on their body and feet. Sounds easy to just walk. But, think again. If you don’t train, you will regret it. I don’t care if you’re an avid runner, CrossFit-er, or how good of shape you’re in, this is different. I will admit there are a very few people I’ve seen just show up and walk, without painful injuries.  You don’t want your feet looking like the picture above–he didn’t last.  This was a few years ago after about 11 miles.

There are only a few tips I can share for preparing for this walk:

  1. Train, Train, and Train.
  2. Get the right shoes and socks

Beginning in Feb/Mar, I walk every Saturday morning. I increase my mileage each week and wear the shoes, socks, pants, and backpack that I will wear for the actual event in May. And since the weather is getting warmer, I start going barefoot more often to harden up my feet. It’s important to get your feet prepared. I’ve seen too many people regret doing the walk–even after four miles–because they didn’t train. Some of them are tough guys and they think they can slip on some sneakers and walk. Trust me, this normally doesn’t work out too well.

Since Mark’s walk is mostly on paved roads, all my training is on pavement. The terrain in Haleyville, where the walk is held, is hilly so I train with hills. I also like to ruck with a weight plate in my GR2 backpack early on, then as the miles get higher, I remove the weight.

For shoes, I like to use hiking boots. I’ve used Scarpa and La Sportiva brands. I like the latter best. They are wider and lace up faster. However, the Scarpa are pretty comfortable and very durable, they are just narrower and lace up higher than I need for this event.  Wear whatever shoes you want, just train beforehand.  There are some people who prefer tennis shoes/sneakers, but just because they are soft and are great for around town, doesn’t mean your feet will like them after several continuous miles.

For socks, I only use Smartwool Trekking (and have recently started to slowly implement Vermont Darn Tough hike/trek. Be aware these specific Smartwool’s are thicker than the Vermont hike/trek). When I get over about seven miles, I change my socks. I also apply some talc powder/Gold Bond directly to my feet to help keep them dry. Even if my feet feel good, I normally go ahead and change to a fresh pair of socks. For the actual event, I change at each rest stop, which is every 4-7 miles. Some years, I’ve opted not to change at the last stop b/c my feet feel good and there’s only 4 miles left.

There are other variables that are good to prepare for like rain, heat, cold, hydration, blisters, and chaffing.  We’ve had temps in the 40’s and raining to sunny and 80’s, with high humidity.  If you want to use a bladder system for hydration, train with it.  The day of the walk isn’t a good time to have to adjust your gear or find out it’s just not doing what you wanted.

Training for the walk is very time consuming. It’s also a great workout, especially with added weight. In addition, it’s a great time to listen to music, podcasts, or just enjoy the sounds of nature, mingled with cars driving by giving suspicious looks.

For more info on present and past walks, visit Mark’s site here.

Another walker after mile 30.
Another walker after mile 30.

Sincere Appreciation

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JAG 28A portion of all sales of “My Brother in Arms” goes to The Mark Forester Foundation.  So, throughout the year, I participate in fundraisers for Mark’s foundation.  Recently, I took part in my 5th CrossFit JAG 28 Hero WOD (workout of the day).   I’ve done them in three different gyms (called boxes) in August when it’s extremely hot, September when very comfortable, to January when cooler.  Each workout consists mostly of people I’ve never met and who never knew Mark.  But what happens is people want to sweat and suffer in order to raise money for a foundation that honors Mark Forester.

What makes so many want to do this?  Yes, many people are just looking for reasons to get a good workout.  You can look at how well the series’ of Tough Mudder, Spartan Race, and Warrior Dash have done the last several years.  I completed a Tough Mudder in Feb with temps in the 40’s and wind chill much colder than that—I was miserable.  And that event didn’t even support a specific fallen hero.

Then there are others who just want to honor one of their fallen.  Some can connect with Mark since he went to The Univ of Alabama, where he is from, or because he was in the military.

For me, I love the exercise.  And even though I work out regularly, I only do this type of workout when it’s the JAG 28 fundraiser.  It’s painful.  While doing it, I like to think of the extreme training Mark and his teammates went thru so they could don the red beret.  Mark used to tell me how awful some of their workouts were–flutter kicks and push ups for hours, for example.  When considering that, I can handle some discomfort for 30 mins.

To those good friends who organize them each year, I sincerely thank you.  I’m constantly amazed at the selflessness and loyalty of so many who want to honor my brother.  And to those gym owners and participants, you can never be thanked enough.  I’m also appreciative that CrossFit honors all our fallen heroes with WOD’s throughout the year.

I am fortunate to be able to share Mark’s example by writing his biography and by taking part in fundraisers.  Next time you feel a workout is too hard, think of those who experience much harder conditions to protect us (or those who gave all).  Temporary pain is the least we can do!

The Beauty of Rejection

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No thanks

One reason that I was fortunate to use Triumph Press as my publisher is b/c I wanted final say in every aspect of the book—the cover, design, and content.  Since they are a small company, I’m left to do most of the marketing.  I enjoy it, but I’m also limited with connections, time and experience.

My goal from day one was to get Mark’s book into brick and mortar stores.  I first contacted Books-a-Million, which has over 250 stores in the US.  They agreed to make an initial purchase and sell in their top-selling stores for biographies.  It was a small quantity, but with this being my first book with little sales data, they couldn’t take a chance on me.  I understood that.  Plus, my distribution chain is somewhat limited.

I found great pleasure seeing my book on the shelf when I visited various stores.  Occasionally I’d buy one and ask the cashier if she’d heard of the book.  Some would say “no” and some would say something like, “I think so”.  They were probably just making themselves believe they’d heard of it.  Anyway, I’d say something about how good I heard the book was and leave it at that.

About a year later, I contacted their buyer again asking if they were going to re-order.  Now, here is the good stuff.  She said:

“No, we will not be reordering this title.” 

I can take that.  I still haven’t gotten an explanation why, but the answer is obvious.  Of course I could go into the shelf placement, yada, yada.  But, bottom line is it didn’t sell fast enough to catch their attention.  However, it didn’t do too bad b/c part of the contract was we’d have to buy the books back if they didn’t sell the quantities they wanted.

Next came the one I really wanted, Costco.  This one is tricky and I won’t go into many details, but here is what they responded with:

costco

There are a few reasons why I think they rejected:

  1. They didn’t like the cover—possibly too strong.
  2. My distribution chain doesn’t meet their criteria. Even though I have a publisher, the paperbacks are still printed thru Createspace.  However, hard covers are printed and distributed thru one of their approved vendors.
  3. They just didn’t like the book.

Regardless, I wasn’t done trying.  About a year later I talked to an author from TN who was doing book signings at every Costco in the southeast.  I met him and asked how he did it.  In a nutshell, is he’s with a traditional publisher, so they got him in.  Even though Costco doesn’t sell his book, it’s in their system, so they could sell from their shelves if wanted.

With some research I found out that American West Books is a distributor who sells to Costco.  If I could get them to purchase mine, they could get my book into Costco and probably other stores.

Well, here is their response:

“We have reviewed the book you sent us and feel we would not be successful with it.

Our retail customers carry a very limited title selection and we believe yours will not produce the weekly sales minimums that are required by them.”

So, two strikes for Costco.  Doesn’t mean it won’t happen.

Now there is a down side to getting into large retail stores—profit margins are very low and they want guarantees that you’ll buy the books back after a certain period if they don’t sell to their standard.  So, if you’re not with an established publisher printing thousands and thousands of books at a time, this is very hard to do.

Even though I’ve received several “No’s”, I’ve been fortunate to have what I deem success regarding book sales.  Amazon is a great tool, both for physical books and Kindle.  I’ve had book signings at several stores and restaurants.

I’m not sure what the beauty in rejection actually is, but it just pushes me to be more creative and persistent.  This is something I believe in so I won’t let up.

Being a self-published author, or one like me who technically has a publisher, but is still responsible for most of the promoting, is a non-stop job trying to sell books.  There’s always work to be done.  And since I’m passionate about the product, I enjoy the entire process and don’t get discouraged by the rejections.  Onward!

Note: if you have any questions regarding my experiences in selling the book, whether on-line or in a store, feel free to ask.  I left out a lot of details.